Sometimes, I think some rather random things. I don’t know if they are worth sharing or appropriate (well, the answer is probably a resounding “NO” on both counts there, actually), but, now they’re out there. And you can’t unread them. You’re welcome.
The real battle of the gods
Well, let’s break some things down for a second – It may not be a landslide, but in a showdown between Sho’Nuff and Hercule, the outcome is likely dependent upon the rules of the match. Hercule is STRONG, but he hasn’t ever tapped into his ki; he relies purely on physical strength to win his matches. This might in part be so because once the Z-fighters removed themselves from the 天下一武道会(Tenkaichi Budoukai) tournaments, there were no other fighters on Earth who had pushed themselves to a similar level, and therefore Hercule never HAD to learn to tap into his ki as a power source. So perhaps through more fighting, intense rivalries, and mental training, he could eventually learn how to use ki to become stronger, but until he is forced to, and presented with the opportunity to consider that prospect seriously, he will never grow beyond his peak physical strength. In fact, it might be actually be the fault of the Z-fighters and Cell for changing so dramatically the scale of the tournament’s battles. Competing at their level of intensity would preclude lower-level fighters from meaningful participation – they simply wouldn’t be able to bridge the gap in ability – and thus lead to Hercule’s incredulity and halted development.
All of that said, IF Hercule learned to tap into his ki, he would be a much stronger fighter. His strength and standing as champion are at least partially valid. But Sho’Nuff HAS learned to tap into his ki – and he believes strongly enough in himself to continue pushing and enhance his use of that power. He has demonstrated considerable strength against ‘Bruce Leroy’ and all those he defeated in his campaign to become the undisputed Shogun of Harlem. In fact, he’s kind of like a low level Z-fighter – more than adequate in strength alone to hold his own against Hercule at his current level. But if Sho’Nuff were in the world of Dragonball, he would be sure to seek out Goku and the other fighters, forcing himself to grow. He would embrace the challenge instead of running away like a punk.
They’re both on a similar level in terms of physical strength alone, but Sho’Nuff has the ki advantage, the will to learn, and the courage to challenge himself. Hercule doesn’t. Hercule CAN’T win. So, who’s the master? Sho’Nuff.
-Namakemono
Category Archives: Fun
The Canadian Expedition:Into the Frigid Northern Wilderness Pt. 1
-The following is an excerpt from the log of Captain Robinson, recovered from the wreckage of a metal taun-taun people mover in the Canadian Arctic.
Captains log: Day one – 8:30am. I awoke to find my trekking partners encased inside a strange, metal taun-taun. Feeling the urge to stand in solidarity, I sat down and joined them inside for 12 hours.
Captain’s log: Day two – 11pm. I set out on a glorious make-for-great-of-motherland-and-grand-leader-trek to Canada. America Jr. The world’s largest exporter of perfectly packaged pop stars. Judging by the frozen crystals that hang in the air when I exhale, I’d venture to say that it is cold as balls – upon exposure to the Quebeckian atmosphere, my face spontaneously sprouted a full beard, which assumed a mountain-man-type formation. I fear it is only going to get worse as this expedition continues, as Quebeckian general stores hold no signs of razor sales.
Over the past day and a half, I have spent hours tracking up and down the Quebeckian landscape and have gathered that these Quebeckians must be borne into baths of ice water and spend their summers sunbathing in meat freezers. Even their Quiver (the Quebeckian River) changes directions at their will, it seems. I attempted to soldier through the endless trails of slush in my trusty hush puppies, but eventually quickly stubbornly capitulated to a sturdy pair of boots once I realized that my feet, made of mere flesh and not stainless steel, could not stand up to the refrigeration.
There are many attractive features to be found dotting the Quebeckian landscape, which reminds me of an amalgamation of all the rurality I have experienced until now. Rolling hills of mountain lights like your Salty Lakes or your Pittsburghers, walls of snow like the Yukiguni, intricate light systems designed to distract tourists like your Tokamachis or New Yorkes, Steamy, smoky, fiery clouds of cloud from a Bob Ross painting. None of this impresses me. Did not look.
The Quebeckians speak a strange tongue, part baby, and part B-movie villain. This seems to stimulate hunger.
Exhausted from the trek, I managed to procure a tasty meal of ale and mutton flesh which restored manliness. Ale seems only to come in your choice of very hoppy or very f*BEEPS*-ing hoppy. Am confident acquired manliness will last until the town cryer shares word of the forthcoming weather on the picture box. Cautious of poutine geysers.
I retire to my chambers for the evening, hoping to claim some relief from the exposure of the harsh Frenchlands. Pushing forward to Mount Reals shortly. Will be on the lookout for pockets of truth.
-Namakemono
Film Rants: 5 Reasons Why I Don’t Like Batfleck
Dave Chappelle’s Dylan, from Making the Band 2 put it best when asked, “Who are the five best rappers alive?”
“Dylan, Dylan, Dylan, Dylan, and, Dylan!”
Well, much like Dylan, I have five reasons why I don’t like Warner Brothers’ next Batman, and they are, in no particular order:
Ben Affleck
Ben Affleck
Ben Affleck
Ben Affleck
And
Ben Affleck
………
………
………
AND BEN AFFLECK, BEN AFFLECK, BEN AFFLECK!!!!
Stunned? Yes Ben, I know, all this probably seems like a lot to take in, coming to terms with the existence of an opposition to your taking up the mantle of the “World’s Greatest Detective.”
But you can’t erase Daredevil. You just can’t. Don’t try to act like you’ve grown and matured in the time since that awful excuse for a movie was given to the world; If you couldn’t play the serious gruffybear intellectual superhero the first go around, I’m simply not apt to believe you will do too much better this time.
Not to mention, the Chris Nolan Batman trilogy was an incredible example of story telling. Hit-and-miss here and there, but ABSOLUTELY entertaining throughout all three films, regardless of whatever shortcomings you manage to find. It’s difficult to imagine that you would be able to find a balance between that and Batman and Robin. If you escalate the intensity of the performance, you’ll be called out for emulating Christian Bale. If you tone the brooding down and play it a bit campier, you will be trounced like Ryan Reynolds’ depiction of Hal Jordan, and thrown in with the Schumacher films. Either way, you’ve got your work cut out for you in creating a new cinematic portrayal of Batman that we can all get behind.
This isn’t like the situation with Chris Evans, Ben. Captain Torchmerica is incredible. You can’t simply switch teams and expect that we will forgive you your transgressions. Chris Evans has garnered brand loyalty and respect by remaining with the same brand (different production companies but the brand familiarity still goes a long way), and although the Fantastic Four movies were about as good as Daredevil, the key difference here was in the performance. Chris gave a spirited performance as the Human Torch and was easily the most interesting character of the FF movies. Moreover, as he moved into the role of Captain America, he continued to deliver performances with a level of sincerity that simply was not expressed in your portrayal of Mr. Murdock. Even if we overlook the story quality and tone of your respective former franchises as dogmatic of an era in film when the superhero flick was still developing its key qualities, your performance simply falls flat.
Ben, at this point in your career, you have TOO strong of a presence for me to accept you as a character such as Bruce Wayne. When I watch your films, I am not watching Brian, or Steve, or Dirk Jenkins, or whoever the credit roll says your character is. I simply can’t suspend my disbelief; I am watching Ben Affleck. YOU are a character now, Ben. Much like beloved thespian Nicholas Cage (My favorite actor and star of Ghost Rider Nicholas Cage Rides a Motorcycle While His Head is On Fire), you are too much of a spectacle to sink into a character; rather, the characters you play merely become vehicles through which you pretend you are living someone else’s life. Like The Prince and The Pauper. But I see all-too-vividly through your new clothes, emperor.
I could sooner accept you as a villain than as THE Bat; your schmoozy, lofty, smarm-charm would lend itself well to the likes of the Riddler or perhaps a lesser known villain in Batman’s stable. S-*BEEPS*-t, I’d even accept you as Lex Luthor (Ok, no I wouldn’t, and I would object to that just as vehemently), but I simply cannot be compelled to acquiesce to the Batfleck.
In the end though Ben, it would have been absolutely ludicrous of you to turn down the chance to be the Caped Crusader. The cards are dealt; we’re aiming for a flush. So please, please, please, please, PLEASE, Ben, prove me wrong. Make me love your Batman. Usher all of us DC fans into the next era of cinematic greatness with a performance worthy of that iconic cowl.
*Update* I am so pleased that he did prove me wrong. Ben rose to the challenge and gave us a Batman worth our respect. While Batman v Superman was far from perfect, this Batman – and this Bruce Wayne – are absolutely intriguing enough to deserve more of our attention. Congratulations, Ben. Looking forward to seeing where you take the character from here.
-Namakemono
Related articles
- Ben Affleck as Batman: Seven Reasons Fans are Unhappy (entertainment.time.com)
- 15 Suggestions for a Better Batman Than Ben Affleck (mashable.com)
A Fanboy’s Disappointment: Why I Don’t like the PlayStation 4
This is a piece I wrote a few months ago, around Sony’s press conference unveiling the PS4 system. My opinion regarding the system is constantly evolving, but I feel that it’s worth sharing my thoughts regarding their approach to the next generation of gaming at that point in time.
Sony recently announced its latest entry into the PlayStation family of products, the PlayStation 4. Hailed (by its own executives and partners) as a technological marvel, the PlayStation 4 represents the ‘cutting edge’ of gaming technology. As a die-hard PlayStation fan since the days of the PS1, I was quite excited about its release for some time. However, after watching the press conference for the new system and realizing the direction in which Sony intends to take it, I can no longer consider myself a fan. Here’s why I don’t like the PlayStation 4: it’s a computer, not a console.
Although consoles are technically computer systems, computer and console gaming present two distinct experiences. Consoles have traditionally distinguished themselves as dedicated gaming devices comprising a part of your home entertainment center, while gaming is simply one of many things you might do to pass time on a computer system. For me, console gaming is a source of excitement and bonding akin to the cinematic experience. Gathered with friends in front of the console, the room is transformed into an area of uninhibited freedom, imagination, and fun. It is that specific nostalgia and localized experience had when gaming on a console that drives my interest in console gaming. The nature of PC gaming, however, is much less spatially transformative and embraces the fact that players do not always play together in the same physical location. The PlayStation 4 places its own value here, in decentralized gaming, at the expense of the traditional console experience.
The planned cross-play functionality of the system further reinforces the decentralized experience which Sony aims to cultivate. Via its cloud-based gaming platform Gaikai, Sony plans to allow for gaming on tablets, phones, and its Vita system. However, by allowing for such playability on a multitude of non-PlayStation [console] devices and by designing the PlayStation 4’s architecture to resemble other devices in its specifications, a dedicated PlayStation console loses relevancy. It’s great to imagine that one day soon, I could play my favorite games anywhere, on any device, at any time, but then why would I need a PlayStation 4?
Beyond this, the increased integration of social media and interconnectivity platforms planned for the PlayStation 4 are a double-edged sword. Sony wants to allow users to share their experience with others across the internet like never before, making in-game picture and video sharing an embedded feature and even allowing for remote control of another player’s game. They also want to keep your social media contacts consistently updated on your gaming habits and achievements while tracking your preferences in order to provide you immediate access to games you might find interest in. These features sound useful, but the security risks and potential for overreach is high.
Sony has had its share of network issues in the past and has shown that they don’t always protect user information as they should. Allowing Sony even greater access to user information could increase the chances of sensitive information leaks. In the case of those who don’t like oversharing the details of their private lives, allowing such unrestricted access to their gaming habits could infringe upon their right to privacy. Furthermore, an unwanted barrage of useless information about other people’s gaming habits is bound to be a complaint of such access. There is also the potential for overly-intimate targeted advertising and the chance of unwanted remote interference with a player’s gaming experience. Even if Sony manages to subdue the most serious of these red flags, it will have a tough time convincing those opposed to the overreach of social media that the PlayStation 4’s approach to social platforms is a positive selling point.
Newsflash Sony, I am not interested! Moreover, if I, representative of your target demographic, am not interested then the PlayStation 4 is going to need much more than it promises so far in order to become a profitable and successful video game console.
*Update* Well, three years later, it turns out that I am still just as much of a Sony fanboy as ever, and the proud owner of both a PS4 and Playstation Vita, on which I have logged numerous hours across the planet remotely cross-playing. I’ve also grown into a big fan of the social features, and I am extremely impressed with the convenience of Sony’s remote content delivery features. You really have to love it when your foot winds up in your mouth.
-Namakemono
Film Rants: The Man of Steel Has Some Cracks in His Mantle..
I have some thoughts to share on Man of Steel which I recently watched, and I thought I’d share them here. Tonight. With you. There are some spoilers, so if you haven’t seen it already, deal with it and keep reading anyway (Is it really that terrible to know what happens? Movies are notoriously guilty of reusing the same tropes and narratives anyway. It’s all about, as Megamind would say, “PRESENTATION!”).
Dear Man of Steel Players:
My name is Jon, and I have a couple of pointers on your performances. You can trust me, I’m a pro, and the internet says that I’m on the internet. I’m pretty sure that counts as a legitimate credential. Anyway, here are my tips, thank me later:
Kal-El: Smash more. You’re well on your way to putting the Hulk out of a job.
Jonathan Kent: Just to save a dog, and prove a pointless point? Really?
Jor-El: I’d pay to see a movie about you. Also, sweet Jedi Force-Ghosting.
Perry White: It took you 2 hours too long to decide that evacuation was a good idea. C’mon son.
Also, it was outside of your window, but you watched it on tv?
Also, where did that video feed come from?? Who was still rolling cameras on all that? Clearly someone as dedicated to standing abnormally close to danger as you.
Military: You are flies buzzing around a bullfight. Quit that.
Lois Lane: When a guy lugubriously ends what is ostensibly his last link to a society/species he recently learned he was part of, and which would apparently just as soon be rid of him, give him some space.
Especially when he’s got super strength, because to him you’re just a big water balloon.
Clark Kent: You might as well have been walking around with a GPS tracking device in your pocket. How could you possibly think that after all of THAT, covering your tracks was as simple as a pair of glasses and a new job?
General Zod: You were right, and you know, deep down, you aren’t really a bad guy. However, a bit of soft diplomacy, and perhaps a consultation or two with the scientists of our great planet would have provided you with a nice condo down the street from us. We might have even helped you move in. That Kepler telescope is pretty good hardware you know.
General Zod’s Scientist, Jax-Ur (A.K.A. Jor-El’s replacement): You extracted the necessary information contained in the codex from Kal-El’s blood, didn’t you? And you and your buddies found that nice outpost that had everything you’d need to recreate your civilization on another planet, right? Not like it was destroyed or anything, clearly.
So….You let Zod and pals keep on raging, instead of suggesting a tactical retreat, giving you the time to go ahead and use that codex info to build up a super army, WHY?
Also, How did you know that you should check his blood? What part of his completely identical-to-yours physiology screamed, “cut me open I have secrets!” I understand imprisonment, coercion via painful means, etc. but running a lab report on the man? Straight out of left field, bruh. Clearly, we know why you were probably destined to remain Jor-El’s lab assistant before he decided that you and everyone else on Kypton weren’t worth building a spaceship for.
Best,
Namakemono
Namakemono no Manifesto 